What A Day To Be Me!

Well, I have to say that being me isn't always the funnest thing on the planet. I am not saying this for pity, because I am WELL aware that there are MANY MANY more people with much harder lives than me. Truly. But, when this year comes to an end, I don't honestly believe that I will be feeling much nostalgia for 2008. So, I am trying a new strategy to see if possibly I can end 2008 with joy and gratitude instead of regret, a private pity party and some cheese fries.

Here goes. I recently got a new trainer. Yes, another blow to my fragile sanity, after 8 months of trust, sweat and tears, my beloved trainer Ember quit the gym to move onto bigger and better things and yet again I had to put on my big girl panties and deal with this news. Needless to say, I didn't take it well. No....I did not. So, with a heavy heart I met with Todd, my referral trainer (a HOT guy) and decided after some soul searching, to give him a chance. Now, you have to understand my thinking when I met Todd.

1. Adorable


2. Positive in every way (LOVED the Secret!)


3. Would have to measure my body fat index every month which would require him to pinch my various fat areas of my body.....WHAT THE??


4. Was "super psyched to work with me and was gonna rock my world"


5. Totally AGAINST any processed foods..........of ANY sort.


6. Has an adorable girlfriend that I met on the second day. Whatever.


7. Is a text messaging fiend and LOVES to send my positive messages with smiley faces on each one.


8. Smells really good, so it distracts me from what I am doing and I almost drop weights on my face during sets.


9. Is completely insane in terms of his estimation of my abilities to lift really heavy amounts of weight.


10. Did I mention the whole body fat measuring thing?? Help me.

But, I decided to throw my fears out the door and see what he could do with me. What have I gotten myself into??

1. Worked out with me sooo hard the first day I couldn't move in any direction without wanting to bite down on a rawhide strip to stop me from biting my lip off! (then told me that was a great start and to prepare myself for a hard workout!)


2. Forbid me from doing cardio on the days he tortures me (I mean the days we workout together) so I can't counterbalance my trips to McDonald's with an hour on the treadmill.


3. Took away the treadmill workouts all together. (The only exercise I had perfected and knew EXACTLY how to do!)


4. Took away cardio all together for a week to "get a clean slate so he could really get me going in the right direction" Again I say WHAT??


5. Continued to over-estimate my abilities on a regular basis. Dear Lord.....help me.

But, here's where it got interesting and today's breakthrough came into play. I got up this morning and actually decided I was due for a great day and was going to let it happen. So, I got up and ate my healthy breakfast, took my vitamins and took a deep breath to see what was in store for me. And you know what?? I had a spectacular day. I really did. (without McDonald's and cardio!) I got a mail order package in the mail and everything fit! WHEW HEW! I went to work and just let my day unfold and it was delightful. I let little things roll off my back and laughed and visited with all of my clients. I found a darling bathing suit in a store for my trip and it wasn't the biggest size in the store!! Again I say WHEW HEW!! I am so close to 100 lbs I can taste it and if I open myself up to the possibility that I could lose the weight....who knows what I can do? I am certainly going to try. So, the moral of my story.

I think Debbie Downer has left me for a while. I feel such relief and I am going to do my best to keep trying for happy. I would say I tread on....but I've been banned from treading. So, who knows what's in store at the gym? We'll see. I do love Todd, in spite of myself and I know he has my best interests at heart. I just hope my "best interests" can survive his workouts!