My Heart is Connecting To Kansas...I Have Made Some Friends :)

One of my essentials to living anywhere is friends. My hubby can see friends and be happy he did, but is OK without. I however....cannot. The ONLY thing that got me through the Vernal (Hell) years was my friends. I had wonderful friends that weren't easy to come by. Vernal is like it's own planet. Unless you are from there and aren't 3rd or 4th generation Vernal or Uintah Basin...forget it. You will never quite belong. You will be alright like no one will try to have you killed or anything, but you will ALWAYS be an outsider...Always. You are forever known as a "transplant" and once you are labeled that, its over. So, after almost 2 years of feeling like I had a scarlet V on my chest...we left. Thank You God!! But when I moved to Kansas I knew even less than I did in Vernal and it felt like I had been sent to solitary confinement. But, slowly I am meeting people in the most interesting places...and I am making friends. I now have 5 friends at my Mother-in-Law's nursing home, I have totally bonded with Brad's stepsister I didn't know about, and Brad has reconnected with some old friends in Larned and I have completely adopted them as my own. They are awesome!! AND...to top it off, our new landlord and his wife are amazing and we have started to go to their church which I think we are going to love! My heart is nesting in Kansas...It feels so much better...I tread on :)

**Note Product placement...he thinks he will get some free stuff...lol**

New Awesome Website!!

So, I was doing my duty as a good wife and went to visit the mom-in-law today...awesome. And, we were doing what we usually do while we visit...watching the weather channel on mute and yelling so she can hear us because she chooses not to wear her hearing aid...awesome. I love my life sometimes...don't be jealous. I looked over on her cluttered table and there was a diabetic magazine. So, in my boredom, I picked it up to check it out. Well...there it was. http://www.recipe.com/. What is this you ask?? It is a website filled with easy recipes AND in the recipe ingredient section there are little icons next certain items. Now, I realize this isn't very interesting...but hang on. It is about to rock your world...When you click on the icon...are you ready?? It tells you where (in your area) it is on sale!!! WHAT?? I know!! So, I quickly put it in my phone and decided I needed to share it with everyone I know. Your welcome :) I tread on...apparently to Dillon's today because my ground beef is on sale!!

Follow The Yellow Brick Road...

Well...if life wasn't crazy enough...we moved to KANSAS!! Yes it's true. We are here in the Wheat State (I think) in Augusta Kansas. The move here was hell, I won't lie. And since we've arrived...not my favorite. But, the last two weeks have been so much better. I finally got my license transfer started, the house unpacked and Brad & I are finally both working. We are empty nesters...and I thought I would like it. It has it's good and definitely bad. I miss our daughter. SO MUCH! I just didn't realize how close we had become and what good friends we are until she was suddenly 14 hours away. And I am feeling so far away from her and Garrett. We've already missed a birthday and another one to come and Tanielle got her license and I heard about it by text. Soooo much I took for granted living near by. I can't stand it. Brad hates it too. Mr. "I can't wait to be just us" is now...I miss our kids...sad face inserted here. It's weird. I was only a mom for 2 years and yet I physically miss them. I hope it will get easier...I think my Mom is enjoying us all out of her hair...lol. But, life goes on and I am SLOWLY starting to make friends and nest. I tread on....

Totally Off The Subject...

I am just feeling really blessed today. I truly never believed in my wildest dreams I would ever meet my perfect match and so sometimes I really have to take a second and just let it sink in. Brad is one of the sweetest, kindest, funniest human beings and I still have to try to let my brain comprehend that we not only found each other, but we are married and I finally am a member of a family I created. Please don't misunderstand, I love the family I grew up in. But, I was the square peg...always. I didn't fit. This new family is like a puzzle just made for me and I am the piece that slides right in and completes it. It's something I always wanted but never thought was possible. He gets me. He makes me talk about my feelings and he truly cares about what I have to say. He is my polar opposite and yet, we match. I am so lucky. God answered my prayers and gave me someone to love and spoil and laugh with and cry with and share my life. Anyone who knows me well, knows this was my greatest wish. It isn't the easiest life, it's hard work, but I wouldn't trade it for anything and I am finally at peace. I just had to share. I tread on...

The First Date...Destiny? DEFINITELY!!

Part 2...

So, FINALLY we were off on our date. We went to Chili's, because he wasn't an adventurous eater and he had never been there before...WHAT? We got there and I went to open my car door and he yelled "WAIT!" I was curious but he came over and opened my car door. We walked inside holding hands which I thought I was so cute, and it was packed!! We sat at the bar because it was so crowded and started to chat when the bartender came over and got our drink order. It was so easy and fun and I was starting to rethink my whole "retirement plan" but I was guarded in case this was another first date that would be our last. We ordered and continued to talk and get to know each other better. We knew a lot from our marathon conversation the night before, but this was the good stuff. Plans, dreams, future ideas. He was so real it scared me a little because I really liked him and had been hurt before. He just totally opened up and told me about his past mistakes and how he was trying to do right by his kids and I was sinking fast. We talked about my upcoming surgery and how nervous I was. I have always been a person that put myself down in a sarcastic way, and he called me on it at dinner. He told me if we were going to date, then that had to stop right away and I needed to start thinking like the woman I was, not the girl I was before.

We finished dinner and we were going to go to karaoke, but had awhile until it started to I asked him where he wanted to go. He told me the mall. WHAT?? O.K. The mall it is. We drove to Fashion Place Mall. We walked in, again holding hands (so cute) and got to the center of it and I said, "Where do you want to go?" He looked down at me and said..."I want to play a game with you and I want you to just play along...o.k.?"

Here we go....the weird guy emerges...I thought.

I agreed, reluctantly.

He continued..."Where was the one store you always wanted to shop in, but never could when you were the old you?"

"Uhhhhh....all of them?" I smiled.

He rolled his eyes. "No, really. What was the one store you couldn't shop in that you couldn't because of your size?"

Again I said...."All of them." Looking puzzled.

"Could you just humor me for a minute?"

He was getting a little annoyed and I was squirming a bit because I didn't know where he was going with this.

"Brad, honestly. Other than Lane Bryant, I couldn't shop in any of these stores. It was horrible. I'm sorry I don't know what you want me to say..." I looked away from him.

He put his hand under my chin and lifted it up. "I'm not trying to make you upset. I just want to do something, and I need you to think outside the box here." He gave me a little kiss.

"Well, when I was looking for something to wear in November to my nephew's baptism, I was shocked ad cried a little when I found something to wear in Eddie Bauer. That was amazing! How about there?" I hoped that would work...

"Can I pick one?' he asked.

"Sure." I just hoped he didn't pick Spencer's or Victoria's Secret...

He picked Sears. Just like a guy :)

So, we went to Sears. He took me up to the upstairs clothing section. We walked around a bit and I was really curious. Then we went into the ladies nightie section...

UH OH!

Ummmmmmm....

He walked over and told me to pick out something I wouldn't pick out for myself as the old me.

I must have looked a little uncomfortable, because he looked into my eyes and said, "Trust Me. I am not going to get weird here."

I picked out a few things and then he had me try them on.

WHAT? o.k...I played along.

I found a cute black and pink little nightie and tried it on first. It was the first time I had ever worn something like that and it was so cute. I hadn't realized how much my body had changed and I loved it. I tried on some other stuff but the first was my favorite. I went back out and told him. He liked it and told me I should look around a little more. I did and when I came back, he asked me if that was still my favorite. It was. He said, o.k, and grabbed my hand and walked over to the check out. I looked at him and asked why he wanted to buy it for me and he looked down and said, "I want to buy you something for the new you. It's time you started thinking and shopping for her, not the old you."

I was stunned. We had just met and he was buying me a gift. It touched my heart.

Then he looked at me and said, "I hope I get to see you in this someday."

O.K.....new subject... :)

Then, we went to karaoke. We went to Rock Bottom where my friend Todd works as a DJ. It was hopping that night and I had warned him that it was accurately named...He laughed when we got there and told me this was just his kind of place. Whew. We sat down and ordered a couple of sodas because he had to drive a long way home. I introduced him to Todd and we started to look over the music selection. He found a few songs right away and I soon learned his type of music was old school country. I so hoped he could sing...

Todd, of course let Brad start off the night and he sang "Ring of Fire" by Johnny Cash. HOLY CRAP!! He could sing!! I was totally digging him right then. This was like a dream. He finished and I went crazy as did everyone else there. He was amazing! Todd looked over and mouthed, "SCHWWEET!!" He sat down and decided it was time to see if I could sing. I went up and sang one of my stand by's...Pat Benatar's "All Fired Up" I love that song. He cheered and smiled as I came over. We chatted and kissed and had a wonderful time.

Later on, a lady went up and sang a country love song and he grabbed my hand and said "Let's Go Dance..." We danced and he sang in my ear. I was in trouble...

We sang and laughed and Todd came over and chatted and he liked Brad a lot which was good for me. We stayed way too late and I felt so guilty because by then I knew how far he had to travel. He just laughed and told me he didn't want the evening to end. We finally left at 1am and he took me back to the house. We kissed some more and then I let him go. It was the most amazing night of my life and I was walking on clouds. I just hoped I would see him again and he felt the same way...

When he showed up the next morning to surprise me and take me to breakfast, I nearly fainted!

To Be Continued...

Let's Start At The Beginning...

This is an actual picture of our second date...it's like we knew :)

So...I got married. WHAT?? It's true. Little old me. Crissy Olpin got hitched! It is the most amazing thing. I found the one. He is my total opposite in just about every way. He is a southern redneck, NASCAR fan, Dallas Cowboy fan, divorced father, truck driver, outdoor lover, Walmart shopper, no nonsense kinda guy from Kansas. I am a suburban city dweller, movie lover, shopper, hairstylist, quilt maker, Target diva, travelling maniac from Utah. Truly, on paper we should have never met, let alone fall in love and get married and yet, our differences seem to compliment each other in the best way. Now, I'm not saying it is all smiles and roses...We are both passionate individuals and our relationship has been put through the ringer, almost from the day we met, but there is a love and a commitment that I never dreamed I would find in this life that is stronger than either one of us thought was possible. Just this morning, we were sitting on our couch snuggling for the 2 minutes we were ahead of schedule and Brad turned to me and said..."Can we put a little more of this into our busy schedule?"

These are the moments I treasure in the midst of our hectic life. We truly get each other and it is what I've always wanted. I've married my best friend and I feel truly blessed. I just wanted to give a little back story so someday we can look back on this and remember the good times we shared the first year we had together and share a few fun stories with my pals that if I had been a good blogger, you would have heard along the way.....like our first date.

I had been on more than a few first dates as you know, because I had been complaining about it quite frequently on my blog. So, that very week I had announced to anyone who would believe me that I was retiring from dating and was content to be single. Frankly...I was now really clear on why men my age were single, if they were. They had VALID reasons! So, when my friend from Romania Alex invited me to join a website he was on, so I could be his "friend", I was a little annoyed to say the least, because I quickly found out it was a type of "hook up" sight for people from all over the world. TAGGED is a mix between Facebook, MySpace, and Match.com and none of the good ways. But, I figured I'd add my profile to his list of friends and be done with it. The next day, I received a bunch of emails from Tagged, telling me I needed to find my Meet Me Matches...whatev. I ignored the first 3 and then decided to see what the hell they were bugging me about. So, I went on the website, and saw what they were describing. Basically it was a picture, a name, where they were from and an age. And was I interested? Seriously, nothing could be further from my mind. But, so they would stop harassing me...I looked. Well, among my "interests" from all over the world, there was Brad from Bottle Hollow Utah. Where in the crap was Bottle Hollow Utah? So, I decided to find out. I thought at least I would discover some geography...I clicked "YES" on Brad.

The next day, I received several emails from Tagged. I had a meet me match, a new email, a tag, a comment and someone had signed my guestbook. Great...there were stalkers from Bottle Hollow, Utah. I was going to kill my friend Alex. So, I went home at lunch and was going to say thank you to Brad and then delete my profile, when an instant chat popped up and Brad was home and wanted to visit. Oh GEEZ! I said hello and told him I had 2 minutes, because I was just home to let my dogs out, and agreed, begrudgingly as a newly retired dater, to chat later. Then, I ran back to work to escape!

I got home later that night and I was so tired, because I had gotten up at 5am to go running, because I was training for a 5K and had worked all day and I had stupidly agreed to run the next morning at 5am again. But, I thought I would be nice and chat for 2 minutes with Brad, and then go to bed. So, I logged on and Brad was waiting. Crap. We chatted for a bit, and he turned out to be really funny and direct, but I wasn't interested in anything other than friendship, because I had retired...remember. So at 930, I got off the computer and went to bed. He probably thought I was a senior citizen in real life because I was going to bed so early, but he gave me his number and told me to call if I couldn't sleep. Yeah right. But, I went to bed and promptly got my second wind and couldn't sleep. UGHHHHH. At 11, I decided to test the theory. I called Brad. "I KNEW YOU WOULD CALL ME!!" he laughed. Crap. So, I started talking to Brad. First of all, he has this amazing deep voice and is a no nonsense guy. He tells it how he sees it. We talked for a long time. We found out all we could about each other and he really wanted to get to know me. He kept trying to get me to meet him the next night in Heber. I still wasn't sure where Bottle Hollow was and I told him I would meet him in 2 weeks when we got to know each other. We could be friends. He was so offended when I told him that was how all the 48hrs specials started...she met him in Heber. Did I think he was a serial killer? I didn't know, and I wasn't willing to find out. I said Ted Bundy was very charming. He told me Ted Bundy was dead and I announced he could be his cousin...

Well...at 3am, I caved. He told me Bottle Hollow wasn't that far and he would drive to SLC to meet me. I didn't realize he lived 2.5 hrs. away. At 5am, I told him I had to go so I could go running. I was delirious at this point anyway, so what difference did a run do to my exhaustion? I got up, fixed my hair and put on my shoes and went running. I thought I was going to die. He was going to meet me at 6pm at my house. I had to work all day, so my only chance to get ready was in the morning. This should go well. Another horrible 1st date to complain about for my blog. SUPER. I went to work and at 1030am the texts started coming. We text all day. I had to work until 530, but at 2 I get a text..."I couldn't wait to come. I'm on my way!!" What? He wanted to come hang out and watch me work and then we would go out. I think not. I was already tired and didn't want an audience at work. So, I called him and said...OK this isn't cute anymore. TELL ME how far away you are and how long I have until you get here. Or, turn around and go home. He begrudgingly told me he lived 2.5 hours away and he was 20 mins. into his drive. I had until a little before 5. Ok. I cancelled the rest of my day after 3 and gave myself a little primping time before he arrived.

I left my salon at 4pm so I could run an errand and get home in time, when it started raining. Great. I no sooner got in my car, when he called..."I'M HERE...SURPRISE!!" I wanted to kill myself. I was tired and irritated and now soaking wet. This should be my best date ever. I told him I would be 20 minutes and to just hang out. I drove home and saw his car in front of my house. Ok...here we go. I parked and got out my umbrella, which at this point was useless. I walked over to his car and he got out. He was gorgeous! He was all cleaned up and looked amazing and even smalled amazing. Please kill me ran through my mind. I looked up at him and said...."This is unfortunate." He looked at me puzzled and said, "That wasn't the reaction I was looking for." I just motioned him to come inside, I had to salvage what I looked like. He chuckled all the way inside. I took him downstairs to the family room and sat him on the couch and said..."Just stay there. Don't do anything until I get back!" He laughed again and I left him to see if there was any hope to salvage what was left of my appearance. I reapplied my makeup, fixed my hair and changed my shirt and headed out to get Brad.

I had forgotten that my family's picture from 1991 was up on the wall. Big hair...floral mumu and me looking lovely at 270 lbs. He of course was looking at it when I got back. He turned around with this stunned face and said "Which one are you?" Knowing full well which one I was. I said "Guess" feeling humiliated. He just smiled and walked over and said "Why don't you ta about what you've done? I don't even know you very well and I am proud of you. This is a miracle." I totally lost it. I was so tired and touched by what he said and I just crumbled. He hugged me and and told me he didn't mean to make me cry. I just looked up and smiled and said these were good tears. Then I had to go fix my face again! Damnit! But, I decided to give him a more accurate picture of who I used to be. I went and brought out my before pictures at my largest size and handed them to him. Leaving him with..."You should know I was only 19 in that picture. I was 35 when I started to lose weight. Many more years of eating in between." And walked away. As I was in the bathroom I heard..."Holy *@#*!" I giggled a little.

I came out and told him I wasfinally ready and he walked up to me and just stared. Then he grabbed me and gave me a kiss that literally knocked me off my feet and I buckled. He just whispered in my ear..."You are amazing." I held back the tears and smiled and we were off on our date....

To be continued...

What I've Learned...

Well, it's been awhile since I've posted to my blog. My life has definitely taken a few turns, to say the least and I've definitely learned a lot this year and many of those lessons I've learned the hard way. No big surprise there. But, as I recover from the latest in a series of surgeries to fix a lifetime of eating mistakes, I have recently been reminded that this life is short and if you feel you have something to share, do it today, because you never know what tomorrow will bring or even if you will have a tomorrow in which to learn from it. My neighbor Shari, who I've literally know my entire life which is one of those people Heavenly Father blessed with a sweet spirit, a kind disposition, wonderful mothering and wife skills and just an all around good person, passed away from a melanoma yesterday, 4 months after going to the doctor for a routine physical exam. Most of the time I hear when someone like this dies is why does God take the good ones so young? or it isn't fair, or why her?? I tend to take from this kind of lesson, is life isn't infinite and we should act today on things we've been putting on the back burner, because it could happen to any one of us at anytime.

So, here is my "acting upon" for the day. I used to be a regular blogger and I loved my blog. I loved sharing my experiences about weight loss dating, family fun or drama. I loved it. I loved being part of a community that allowed me to rant or share without judgment and it was a wonderful outlet to show my progress on this crazy journey I was traveling on. I don't honestly know what made me stop except other outlets were opened up to me and this simply became just another "thing I had to do". That I didn't do... But, every once in awhile I would think, I should blog about this, it is a big deal. And then I wouldn't do it for on reason or another. So, here I am today. 180 lbs lighter, I have found love in my life, 2 major surgeries completed of the 3 I need to say goodbye to the old me (LITERALLY), I've moved out of my Mom's house and twice since then to find my "nest" and I haven't shared any of it, because I was too busy or just didn't feel like it. But, instead of feeling bad about it, i have decided to use this as a scrapbook, of sorts and spend the next 3 weeks catching up, so if I ever have happen to me what happened to my dear friend and neighbor Shari, I will be able to leave a small chronicle of Crissy behind to show that I loved what has become of my life and maybe someday if I have kids, they will look at this a remember their Mom was a little adventurous, not the the worry wart that they remember I was once a single...overweight...insecure...lady that finally pulled her head out and started to live....stay tuned....